MLB Articles
Kansas City Royals Selling Playoff Tickets Just for Fun
Written by Andy   
Wednesday, 02 September 2009 18:27
With the baseball postseason approaching, teams in contention are now accepting applications for playoff tickets. For example, the Yankees announced their ticket prices for the playoffs yesterday. But the Royals, despite having absolutely no shot at qualifying for the postseason, announced that playoff tickets are available for their loyal fans that have stuck with them all these years.

"It's nice to do something for our fans," said a team representative. "I know these tickets are technically worthless, and they won't get you into an actual playoff game. That is, unless you have a time machine and can go back to 1985 or something. But we feel it's still a nice gesture. I mean, tell a fan on opening day that they can purchase playoff tickets and they'd be ecstatic. We're just giving that to them, without all of the playoff heartbreak."
 
White Sox Wave White Flag, Ozzie Guillen Berates it With Profanity Laced Tirade
Written by Andy   
Tuesday, 01 September 2009 14:31

Ozzie Guillen
Originally uploaded by
jlurie
With the trades of Jim Thome and Jose Contreras, the White Sox have indeed waved the white flag. But manager Ozzie Guillen got in a few parting shots while it was waving.

"I can't believe we are waving the (expletive)(expletive)(expletive) white (expletive)(expletive) flag," said an irritated Guillen. "Flag, you are a (expetive)(expletive) piece of total (expletive). If these (expletive)(expletive)(expletive) would just (expletive) play better, we wouldn't have been in this (expletive)(expletive) mess in the (expletive) first place."

So the sun has essentially set on the White Sox season, but Ozzie Guillen continues to do his best to keep them in the news. Can't wait to see what he does once the regular season starts for the Bears.
 
Dodgers Acquire Thome, Will DH, Bat 10th
Written by Andy   
Tuesday, 01 September 2009 11:15

Jim Thome
Originally uploaded by Keith Allison
In a stunning waiver deadline trade, the Los Angeles Dodgers acquired slugger Jim Thome from the Chicago White Sox. Many wonder where the Dodgers can even use him. A team source tells us that he will be the team's designated hitter and will bat 10th.

"Yes, we play in the National League," said the source. "But since no one watches baseball on the west coast we figure we can get away with using an extra hitter. We'll go ahead and bat Thome 10th. We didn't acquire him to be a $14 million pinch hitter. C'mon."
 
Swinging a Hot Bat Gives Hitter 3rd Degree Burns
Written by Andy   
Wednesday, 26 August 2009 20:29
Things were going well for Matt Diaz. He was swinging the so-called hot bat, with 11 hits in his last 22 at bats coming into today. However, the hot bat finally got to him, causing 3rd degree burns.

"Ow! OWWWWW!" screamed Diaz. "It feels like I burned my hand off! Why did I have to hit .500, why?!? I guess in time, I will be able to see if swinging a hot bat was worth it."

Sadly, Diaz is not the first hitter to succumb to the hot bat, and he won't be the last.
 
Mets Make Commitment to Underachieving Mediocrity
Written by Andy   
Sunday, 23 August 2009 20:49

Omar Minaya
Originally uploaded by Mr Jonathan Ice
Following the dreaded vote of confidence for GM Omar Minaya and manager Jerry Manuel, the New York Mets have reinforced their commitment to underachieving mediocrity.

"It's a big day for New York Mets baseball," said a source from within the front office. "We have overspent and underachieved, and we've committed to it again for 2010. We want our fans to know that we will pursue several high priced free agents this off season, sign them to ridiculous long term deals, and finish somewhere between 75 and 85 wins."
 
Cubs to Ask MLB if Games Can Be Shortened to 8 Innings
Written by Andy   
Tuesday, 18 August 2009 13:35

Wrigley Field
Originally uploaded by wallyg
The 9th inning has not been that friendly to the Chicago Cubs as of late, as they blew yet another 9th inning lead last night. This time it came on the 12th home run given up by Kevin Gregg.
(The Friendly Blogfines) -- (Bleed Cubbie Blue) -- (Zoner Sports)

As a result, the Cubs, instead of finding a closer, will ask MLB if games can be shortened to 8 innings.

"This would really help us out," said a representative of the Cubs. "Hopefully Major League Baseball will go for it. We'd like to keep our 7th and 8th inning guys in place, so eliminating the 9th inning looks like our best option right now."

It has also been reported that the Cubs, in addition to getting rid of the 9th inning, would like MLB to eliminate the Cardinals, Dodgers and Phillies.
 
Nationals Reportedly Offering Strasburg Record Setting Bonus; Unlimited Piggyback Rides
Written by Andy   
Saturday, 15 August 2009 15:50

Scott Boras
Originally uploaded by
code20photog
Reports have surfaced that the Washington Nationals have made an offer to top pick Steven Strasburg that would be a record for a player just taken in the amateur draft. (MLB Trade Rumors) -- (MASN Sports)

This offer has supposedly been on the table for quite awhile. The hold up was not money. Strasburg's super agent, Scott Boras, was holding out for unlimited piggyback rides.

"No one with his level of talent has been taken #1 overall before. He's a 'first ever'" says Boras. "No one has asked for piggyback rides either. I just think it makes sense. Reward a "first ever" with another "first ever". The Nationals would be wise to do this for him. A piggyback ride reduces his chances for injury jogging in from the bullpen, or out to the mound. Plus they're just a lot of fun."
 
Jamie Moyer Taken Out of Starting Rotation; Sent to Nursing Home
Written by Andy   
Wednesday, 12 August 2009 12:24

Jamie Moyer
Originally uploaded by Darrins
Jamie Moyer has been taken out of the starting rotation. Many are reporting about how upset he is at being sent to the "bullpen".

(MLB News)

(All Things Philly Sports)

(Babes Love Baseball)

The aging Moyer is actually being sent to a Philadelphia area nursing home, and he's not too happy about it.

"If they don't want me to start, and they want Pedro, whatever," said the 46-year old Moyer. "But a nursing home? Shouldn't my family be making that decision? I guess my agent should have read my contract a little better."

Moyer's next start will come at the nursing home's "Family Fun Day" this Saturday.
 
Pedro Scheduled to Start Wednesday and go on DL Thursday
Written by Andy   
Tuesday, 11 August 2009 21:31

Philadelphia Phillies logo
Originally uploaded by N i c o_
Pedro Martinez will make his return to the big leagues according to ESPN. He will make his first start for the Philadelphia Phillies on Wednesday vs. the Chicago Cubs. Following the start, he will most likely go on the DL with some sort of injury.

"We are excited to have a pitcher with Pedro's experience take the hill for us," said Phillies manager Charlie Manuel. "It's just unfortunate that Pedro will probably go back on the DL after only one start. I'm just glad that he will be able to contribute."
 
Ozzie Guillen Promises Retaliation if Your Batters Hit Balls at His Infielders, Outfielders
Written by Andy   
Tuesday, 11 August 2009 10:55

Ozzie Guillen
Originally uploaded by SD Dirk
Ozzie Guillen is frustrated with the frequency Chicago White Sox batters are getting hit by pitches. He's also upset when opposing batters recklessly hit balls at his infielders and outfielders.

"I'm sick of this," says Guillen. "I have Konerko with bruise everywhere. Ramirez and Pods (Scott Podsednik) have boo-boos too. You hit balls at us, we hit balls to you. I need protect my players."

Guillen also voiced his displeasure with getting dirty looks from opposing teams. Particularly the "crook eye" and the "stink eye".
 
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